Day 269: Write A Dear Abby

     For those of you that don't know what or who Dear Abby is, it's an editorial column started by Pauline Phillips. She received questions written from her fans and she would publish her answers and opinions for her readers to see. Today, her daughter, Jeanne Phillips keeps her mother's tradition alive by answering e-mails from all over the world. I sent in a message that delt with a problem that is near and dear to my heart, my loathing of small talk. I seriously hate it, and a seriously asked her for help. I asked for advice on how to engage in conversation without using a line as demeaning as "How bout that weather?". I'm still waiting for her response to my troubling problem, so until then, I'll simply greet people with what I like to call "big talk". I'll start off chit chat with something like "Do you believe in aliens?" or "What are your thoughts on parallel universes?". That'll surely get me better acquainted with the public.

Day 169: Read The Newspaper

     Yep, I picked up a Saturday edition of the Denver Post in hopes of culturing my young mind and educating myself on the most important of matters. From the latest conflict overseas, to the score of the last Rockies game, this paper would surely be a key asset to navigating my way through pop culture. The closest I have ever gotten to reading a newspaper was when I would thumb towards the back to read the comics (Mutts was the best).
   

I glanced through headlines and editorials searching for a piece of interesting world news, or really any trivial knowledge that would suffice as small talk material. I found a couple of headlines that looked to be promising; "Phil Campbells Help Town of Same Name" was one that caught my eye. Its a story of Town in Alabama called Phil Campbell and how a tornado tore through it and destroyed some things and killed some people. Word got out about this tornado hitting the town with a peculiar name and a whole bunch of people from around the world, who happen to share the same name as the city (Phil Campbell) decided to come together and help rebuild the town. So you have this totally wrecked town being cleaned up by a group of uber-caring Phil Campells, which I thought was pretty hilarious. I kept on reading and found some interesting articles, but none as far-fetched as that one. Now all I have to do is find an unsuspecting person to tell my interesting tidbit of info too so I can seem so cool and cultured...not.