Day 331: Apply For My Dream Job

     I think I'm reaching that point in my life where I should be thinking more about my future and what I'd like to  be doing with it. Technically I'm an adult now, it's time I start acting like one. I should be saying thinks like "401k" more often. And I should be tucking in my shirt and answering questions with a heavy "Um-hum" instead of moving my mouth so much. I should be complaining about my back hurting and how CNN is biased. In with the old and out with the young as I always say. I'm an adult and my super thick mustache and collection of fine coffee mugs should be enough proof of that. What I'm getting at here, is that I'm a grown up now, and I think I need a grown up job to match my grown up lifestyle (and facial hair). I decided that I am going to become and astronaut.

     I've always wanted to be a moon-walker, but now that I'm all old n' stuff, I finally think NASA will hire me. I was researching (like us adults do) the NASA website, looking for an online astronaut application, when I found a quick questionnaire. I filled it out and even attached my grown-up looking resume and sent it in for inspection. I may not have a college degree of any kind, but I'm sure NASA will want to hire me once I tell them that I own the the innermost moon of Jupiter. If you have no idea what I'm talking about, check this out, I own the moon known as IO.They should be looking over my application as we speak and hopefully they will get back to me with some good news really soon. I can't wait to surf the stars!

Yeah I got some related skills

Day 201: Dream Job- Ice Cream Taste Tester

     My work (Target) suffered a massive power outage for 8 hours yesterday (don't worry, I wasn't there, so they can't pin this one on me) and lost like tens of thousands of dollars in temperature sensitive foods. Basically, all the milk and meat, and more importantly, ice cream were just getting tossed. I was helping out with the throwing away of dairy and meat products when this tall employee with a name tag that read "Westwood" came up to me. He asked me if I liked ice cream and responded with the only answer my good judgement would allow, "yes". I then explained that I happened to work at an ice cream store for the past two year and that I considered myself an expert on the subject. If you know as much trivial knowledge about ice cream as I do, then  your fat, or a former employee. So anyways, Westwood sent me to get spoons to help me with my newly assigned mission. I was to preform a quality test on the ice cream to see if if was still good. I, along with another employee named Brad, strolled down the ice cream isle to pick out products for testing. I asked Westwood if we could try any of the flavors and he responded with "We just lost 30 thousand bucks bucks, I don't think a couple of Popsicles are going to are going to do much more damage". So we took Westwood's advice and reached for some of the fanciest ice creams in stock. Anything from Drumsticks to Klondike Bars were far game. I gave a good college try while I was grabbing ice creams, and I put even more effort in while I was eating it. We individually unwrapped and unopened each product, sampled it, took note of the quality, then sampled it again. We did this till we had our full and where satisfied from our study. I still can not believe that I was actually getting paid to eat ice cream, like a lot of ice cream. That was a pretty good day at work.