Good news! Remember that time I tried the salt water cleanse? And remember how I was all bummed out cause it didn't work at all (It was supposed to cleanse me out)? Well, I'm happy to say that I have discovered a formula that cleansed me out ten times as much as that stupid salt water. Behold, a modest gallon of lukewarm water, the secret to instant diarrhea! The challenge today was what is called the gallon challenge; its simple, just drink a gallon of water in one hour. I think that your supposed to drink milk, but we didn't want to test our luck and I like the taste of milk to much and I would hate for this challenge to ruin that for me. So we went with water. I thought that this was going to be another lame challenge...I was wrong. It was Jarred (a kid from work) and I that decided to try it. We both got a gallon of drinking water from the store, wrote our names on our jugs, set the stop watch for one hour, and cheered to each other before setting off on our thirst quenching journey. We both started off very well. I made sure not to burn myself out in the beginning but I felt satisfied with my progress within my first 10 or so gulps. We marked our progress every ten minutes with a sharpie. I was trailing Jarred by like an inch according to the markers, which meant I had a lot of catching up to do if I wanted to win. We marked the 30 minute mark with a red sharpie and thats about when I started to get nervous, and bloated. I was just barely under the half way mark then, and my whole body started to hurt. I had no idea how painful this challenge would be. My head started to pulsate, my stomach felt like it had reached it's stretching point, and I felt like sitting on the toilet was the only thing on my mind. We had about 15 minutes left when Jarred finished his jug and headed towards the bathroom to relieve himself. I still had about 1/8th to go and I felt like throwing up was quickly becoming more of a probability. I honestly didn't think that I would make it. But thats when I realized that I cant recall a single time where I have successfully completed a food related challenge for this project. I've failed them all so far. Thats when I decided that I would not fail this one. I wanted at least one victory. So, I nutted up, and I shutted up, and I chugged as much unwanted water as I could muster. The chugging didn't last long but, without hesitation, I went right back to my beverage. Soon enough, my bottle was empty, my stomach had surpassed its capacity, and I felt oddly terrible and accomplished at the same time. I did it, I won. Well, for the time being I guess. Since then its been about 6 hours, and I have endured a pretty bad case of diarrhea, 7 separate trips to the restroom to pee, a mild head ache, and me feeling all around like shit. It kind of sucked, but at least I won this challenge, and I cleansed myself out finally.
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